Sunday, December 14, 2008

Just consider it a mental upchuck [Part II]

A collection of stories that I've been meaning to write about, or that other people have told me I should post, or that I've recently just remembered...all here for your reading pleasure.

Part II: Urban Combat Zone

A few years ago, I was dating (but not living with...yet) a US Army soldier. I met him a couple months after he got back from a 12 month deployment in Iraq. That said, he was adjusting to life outside of the war zone but still slightly edgy at times.

One night as we were sleeping, he heard some scratching noises outside the bedroom window. I guess he thought someone was trying to break into the house and so very very quietly grabbed his gun from under his bed, dropped to the bedroom floor and crab crawled his way across the room and under the only window. He cocked the gun and readied himself to attack. Counting to three...he sprang up while simultaneously ripping down the shades, pointing the gun, and yelling at the top of his lungs. As the shade came down, the true nature of the sounds was discovered.

...

A big fat cat. Splayed against the window, hanging by his claws from the screen that covered it on the outside.

Given the situation and his frenzied state at the time I'm sure that laughing my ass off was probably NOT the best response. He was pretty pissed off that I found it so amusing. But on the bright side, that'd show all those damn cats not to come crawling up our windows ever again (lest they get yelled at or worse, have their heads blown off!)

The End

8 comments:

Sabrae said...

Yea laughing probably isn't the best thing to do... lol but I would have been laughing to!!!

That damn expat said...

You and Sabrae must be some fierce chicks because I'd be screaming my head off!
And you are right, that's way scarier than my man.

The Unbearable Banishment said...

Laughing at a man holding a cocked gun can be hazardous to your future endeavors.

pistols at dawn said...

If you ever forget your keys, I guess you just sleep outside, because clearly you can't throw rocks at the window.

Leon Basin said...

I like:)

words words words said...

This is awesome and I will probably steal it for use in a future story.

~E said...

Sabrae: Glad you feel the same way. He got over it after a couple hours and started laughing along with me.

Expat: I think I lost 10 years off my life so I don't know if "fierce" is the right word to describe me.

UB: I was not laughing at the man...I was laughing at the cat in the window

Pistols: You're right, I like my head just where it is and not blown to a gajillion different pieces

Leon: Welcome to my blog!

WWW: Go right ahead, just don't copyright infringe me and cite your sources and whatnot

Amanda said...

As someone who has gone through the homecoming part of deployments more than once, I've learned a few things:
1) Making a rule like "you can have your gun but no ammo in the house for the first 2 weeks back" is okay.
2) What they're going through isn't always easy.
3) If I had just come back from 12 months of getting shot at, I'd probably be just as jumpy.