Travelog 2: Pike Place Market, Evergreen Point Park (Medina, WA)

A combination of a Vlog with some much needed shout outs and dedications, and my next Travelog Series about Washington State. Hope you all enjoy!

LOL-ing in the hot noonday sun...

A female officer pulls over and arrests a drunk driver. The female officer tells the man:

"Sir, you have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be held against you."

The drunk replies:




"TITS!"

Travelog 1: In and Around Seattle

I'm inspired by Scope over at ScopeTech aka Love Letters to Cora and his post on his hometown, Chicago. And also of Fancy Schmancy's lovely vacation photos! Although I wasn't born in Seattle, I've lived here for over 3/4 of my life and I love it here!


As such, I thought it would be nice to do little travel/touristy videos of my state and city to show all you people. I'm also thinking about going back to pictures from my past travels and showing you my actual hometown (aka the Philippine Islands) and other places but that will take some digging and work and I'm just too lazy right now. That and I'm running out of funny anectodes and stories and awkward memories to share with you and this here is in hoping bright colors and flashy videos are enough to distract from the lack of actual material.

This first video is at the Skagit Tulip Festival (kinda...there weren't any tulips yet...too early in the season) in Mt. Vernon, WA. Then there's some of the Seattle Waterfront and Pier. And finally at my Alma Mater, the University of Washington - Seattle. All taken in one rare sunny day. Song is by Pearl Jam called "Even Flow".

Enjoy!

Really Quick Update...

Backstory: went to NW Folklife Festival at the Seattle Center this weekend. Just as we were about to leave, I thought it would be cool to ride the Ferris Wheel. Just as the ride started, I remembered something very important.

(Warning: Turn your volume down before starting video)

Forgot how you were terrified of heights, did ya??? You remember now though, don't you?!?

Thanks to Nerick who was nice enough to take a video of me while I was busy trying not to pee my pants or throw up all over him.

Working on a couple blog posts and vlogs about Seattle travels...looking forward to reading everyone's blogs soon!

VLOG 2: Waxing a bit of the profound

"When you love someone, you open yourself up to suffering. That's the sad truth. Maybe they'll break your heart. Maybe you'll break their heart. But you'll never be able to look at yourself the same way. Those are the risks. You see two people and you think...they should be together. But nothing happens. And that's the burden. Like wings, love has a weight. We feel that weight on our backs, but they are a burden that lifts us. Burdens which allow us to fly"

-- Bones, TV show, narrated by the character 'Jack Hodgins'

VLOG 1: It's like crack!

Warning!

Gratuitous boob shots, girlyness, blogger buddy shoutouts and a peek into all ~E's secrets.

Proceed with caution.

--The Management.

...don't forget your happy slip!

I'm so friggin sorry you guys. I know I said I won't post any more stupid makeup videos on here anymore and I never will again...(cuz I have a separate channel for that now! Booyah!) but It's like 5 in the morning and I haven't slept yet and I'm browsing YouTube and found this chic, who coincidentally is a friend of the guy whose videos I showed you last time.

Dammit..I know Im not making sense right now but I'm still awake ok! I've been awake for like 30 hours...Sue ME!

Anyway, It's 5am and I'm freaking falling off my bed laughing my buns off at this chic (in the best possible way). Her experience with faking it turned out much much MUCH better than my first time.

...that's what she said...

I mean my first fakes were like poking me in the eye...and I got glue all up in there. ALL up in there and I was crying and... Tragic,

I'm gonna share this video with you people. Because. I mean seriously. I'm sleep deprived and I'm laughing here. It's funny.

I dare you not to laugh. I Double Dog Dare you!

What does that even mean.

VIDEO:

"I'm totally blingin today and you hate it!"

Ok so backstory: I have a a thing about watching makeup tutorials on YouTube and have a subscription to the YouTube channel of my favorite drag queen/makeup artiste extraordinaire Petrilude...


(his real name is Josh...)


(I know, kinda anticlimactic right?)


Anyway, Josh hosted a contest a while back asking his readers to create a look based on a picture of a sunset off Waikiki Beach. Total girlyness, but whatever...I'm a girl. Deal with it. His friend Nick (dressed as alter-ego Keisha) entered a faux contest entry and posted it. You can skip all the makeup parts and just watch the first minute...and the last 25 seconds.





Though I don't know why you would...any guy who can sport a wig and beard and limited makeup items and still look that damn good deserves to be fawned over.


I like to think he raided his sister's or girlfriend's makeup bag to do this...more on that later.


Hilarity will ensue. I guarantee it!


And here's another video from his channel. Just to show he isn't all about the girly boy makeup tutorials.






I swear I love those two guys. Never fails to make me snot-out-the-nostril laugh so hard! If they weren't both gay (one definitely...the other one maybe but I hope not) I'd marry them both in a heart beat.


Except then I'd be a polygamist and ~E don't swing that way.


And also I'd be scared they'd both be prettier than me, and ~E don't swing that way either.

K...I totally snuck that last vid of me in there (better lit one available if you clicky the linky down below)...but I think everyone deserves to know how to properly treat any nasty facial activities that may pop up from time to time. And I know I promised never to post makeup vids here again. In my defense that was NOT a makeup vid. It was a public service announcement.

So sue me.

(actually please don't. I'm poor. However, I'm not against anyone pimping me out to their friends)

(By ME I mean my other blog)

(Clearly)

Looking Back...

I wrote this a couple weeks ago, and just now managed to edit it and post it. Hope you like!

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I'm sitting here at [big seattle college institution] where my mother teaches. In the cafeteria area, with my backpack next to me and my grande caramel mocha with whip close at hand. Earphones in, music blasting away and I'm sure amongst all the other oblivious souls with their open texts or open laptops or open mouths (hastily gulping down that last drop of coffee before their next class) I look just like them. Just another student cramming away towards whatever goals we all strive for. I'm not one of them though. I used to be, but today I'm the other...the "enemy" so to speak. Today I've been invited to guest lecture, first year basic biology (sure it was my mother who did the inviting, and it's my mother's class I'm lecturing...but it's darn cool anyway). I'm not due on stage for another hour and I've already gone over my notes more times that I really ever needed to.


When I was in High School, I couldn't wait to get out. To me it was just a stepping stone towards what I really was looking forward to; college and freedom. I did about as well as I possibly could have, graduating in the top .5% of my class (yeah, you read that right... 0.5%, tied for second over all four years). My only non-A grade came from one semester of dreaded PE and you better believe I dropped that class the first millisecond I could. But I didn't do it for the "acclaim" though I have to admit it was really satisfying to hear my name called at every awards ceremony. I did it to ensure that I will get into the college I wanted to. Every little bit counted. Did all the right sports, took all the right classes, joined the best clubs. And when I graduated with the acceptance letter to [Huge Washington based research university] in hand, I gladly said good bye and good riddance and never looked back.


My 5 years at said university was all I ever could have wanted and more. I LOVED it! There, I was in my element. Independently studying among likeminded individuals all reaching for higher summits and being encouraged and challenged every step of the way. I can choose my own path, master of my own destiny and so on. Of course it wasn't all about studies (DUH!) and I had 6 of the best girl friends anyone could ever hope for to experiment with (no, not in that way...pervs!) To Cry with. Grow with. Laugh with. Parties, study dates, late night cram sessions, running to each others rooms for no reason just to talk, pranks...the quintessential college experience. Roaming around campus and the U-District in my NorthFace fleece and backpack and feeling like I belonged. Here in this school (so big it had it's own zipcode) with 45,000 other students, I felt like I really found my place in the world. I would go back in a second. Do everything over again, even all the tests and stress, the dickhead professors, waking up 15 minutes before a final or midterm, rolling out of bed after a long night of cramming to run to class in my pjs, take the test, crawl back to my dorm or apartment and go right back to sleep (or to study for the next test as it more often was the case). Give (almost) anything to feel that free again, free of any responsibilities past making sure you get home ok after this party, making sure you get to that coffee place on time to meet your friends, making sure you study just enough to pass the nasty Calculus exam tomorrow.


I graduated almost 4 years ago and I think it's taken me that long to feel like I belong in this next phase of my life. I've considered going back to school to earn my Masters and it is still an option for me. Real Life, if this is what it really is, is a bit harder to get acclimated to. I don't feel welcomed, not like how I felt from the first step onto college life and how I felt till the day I walked up the steps to accept my diploma on my graduation day.


I don't know what made me think of all this. Perhaps the building...filled with the thoughts of countless generations of students. Perhaps the atmosphere, the sounds of voices all around me, getting steadily louder as I sit here and type this. Its been a nice interlude, looking back and reminiscing. I should really look over my notes one more time... Or maybe not, I know this stuff, and if I mess up *shrug* who'll know but me? For now and the next 15 minutes till class starts, I'm gonna keep putting off "real life", keep pretending to be one of them, simultaneously wishing I was and being oddly grateful I'm not.

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[new video up...]

Darn Technology!

Hello all! Sorry I've been a no-show at everyone's blogs lately. My internet decided to crap out on me last week and I've been unable to read blogs, post new ones (most that have gone out were postdated), and all other internet-y things.

Thank you in advance to all those who have been leaving comments or emailing me wondering where I was (yes, Felisa...I'm still alive...no bellyflopping over any bridges :), and Words...did you get that postcard yet? ). Ill be getting around to visiting your blogs later today.

Muah!

Mother's Day!

A Mother is God's gift to us,

Sent from up above.

She dries our tears,

And calms our fears,

And wraps us in her love.

I'm fortunate enough to have three sets of grandmothers who are still all alive, and one absolutely awesome mother who (if you are a frequent reader of my blog) you should know I adore.

This is my grandma "R"...she is 75 and acts like a 30 year old. She didn't like us calling her Grandma or Nana or the more traditionally Filipino "Lola" so from as long as I can remember, my brothers, cousins, and I have all called her Mommy R. She raised my brother and I after my parents got a divorce and all my early memories have her in them in some form or another. She lives in New York now and loves to email me e-cards, sends me makeup in the mail (because beauty is beauty but no one said anything about making it better) and email me stories about how she went line dancing or how my aunt got mad at her when she flew to Florida on a whim because "she's never been there before" or how her recent knee surgery is really "slowing down her vibe". I got from her my love of makeup, my style, and my smile...see the resemblance?

This is my Lola "B". She is 79 and the quintessential grandmother (down to the fuzzy white hair!). She sews, knits, crotchets, reads anything and everything under the sun and can cook anyone under the table. She took care of my brothers and I when we first moved to the US. But don't let the quiet Nana look fool you. She was the one who taught me how to walk in heels (because she knew I would be short and she'd be darned if she had a grand daughter who "walked like a lumberjack on stilts") and I still to this day show her first when I've made a new shoe purchase. She taught both my brother and I how to Cha Cha, and Waltz...because everyone knows she was quite the dancer in her day. And she once confessed to me that if she were born a boy, the first thing she would have done would be get a tattoo on her arm. As a result, I told her first when I got my tattoo and I made sure she saw that her name was one of those engraved on my back for all eternity. I got from her my love of shoes and my love of reading.






This is my Lola "C". She turned 87 this year and still walks to church every morning at 6am. Her 85th birthday was celebrated by all 10 of her living children, all 40+ of my cousins and I, and 6+ great grandchildren. Her birthday mass was celebrated by no less than 20 nuns, 5 priests, and 1 bishop. She still has students from her days as a teacher over 50 years ago, visiting her just to say Hello. She exudes love and caring in every pore of her body. She just recently learned how to use Skype and is absolutely tickled at being able to video conference. Now, instead of calling on the phone every one of her family members on their birthday or anniversary she now can sing us "happy happy birthday dear one" on video! And yes, she remembers every milestone, birthday, anniversary, wedding...even though she has to say 5 different names sometimes before she hits on yours (hey, when you've got that many kids and grandkids...). I got from her the love of family and my love for the Church and God.




This is my mom. I love her more than anything in the world because she is understanding...patient...the smartest and toughest woman I know. She will and has done everything in her power to care for her kids and I appreciate her for that. She taught us how to be independent, to be ambitious, and to love each other. I know that no matter how badly I mess up she will always be there for me. I love hearing her unabashed way of laughing. There has been many a time when she would start to tell a joke, but busts out laughing in the middle of it...never finishing the joke but making everyone laugh anyway because of how happy she is. My happiest childhood memories are of her: napping in her dental chair when I was 4, having her sew sequins on my costume for a pageant when I was 6, running across the airport screaming and crying straight to her arms when we moved to the US to be with her when I was 9. She still calls my 15 year old brother "baby" and he will never tell her to stop. My 24 year old brother still calls her every week just to talk. I still give her big hugs when I see her...like I'm 5 again and seeing her is the best part of my day, and I still call her "Mama". She is one of my best friends. I got from her my intelligence, my "don't take crap from anybody" attitude, my wicked sense of humor, my simplicity and heart, and my face! Down to the eyes, nose, and dimple.

My mom at 24

Happy Mother's Day to all the Mothers and Grandmothers out there. Know that you are appreciated and loved!

If I get drunk and fall off a bridge tonight...

...just know that I love you all!

My last will and testament is in my underwear drawer underneath the pile of mismatched socks. Some of you are gonna be getting some very cool things if I happen to meet my maker in the near future!

If I get drunk but don't die, I apologize in advance to all the drunk dialing, drunk texting, and drunk picture messages that may go out to all the unlucky folks out there who just happen to be on my speed dial list.

If I don't get drunk and end up being the only sober one left at the bachelorette party I'm attending tonight then please hope the bride doesn't confiscate my camera (like she's been threatening to do now for weeks) and I get some good juicy shots of everyone else for my bloggy buddies to peruse in a couple days.

In the meantime, I was thinking of posting a video I made while I was getting ready, but I promised I won't post makeup videos here anymore so I'm gonna post it on my other blog. Why? Cuz Dammit, I look really good right now and If I can't bring a camera with me then I want proof I can actually look decently slutty for a girls night out. Besides, I actually talk in this one (like a couple of you said I should).

PLUS!!! There's a lot of bright red lipstick and a cool "finger in the mouth" trick near the end.


(that last line got you didn't it?)


(you're thinking about fingers and mouths and bright red lips huh?)


(you're gonna watch the video and fast forward to the end now aren't you?)


(pervs!)

More Postcards! and Gwen's 600th Post!

These come all the way from South Africa! From blogger buddy Sid over at Verbal Diorrhea






I don't know Sid, I think the baby babboon is kinda cute. Maybe I wouldn't mind so much if one of them threw rocks at me when I'm walking around. Or maybe, Ill freak out, scream, and tell everyone "see? this is why I don't go hiking in the woods!!!".



Yeah, it will probably be that last one.



Last but not least, Gwen over at Everything I Like Causes Cancer is celebrating her 600th post! She was one of my very first readers and I've read her blog almost as long as I've had my own. She asked us to post a picture of an article of clothing we can't live without and then to tell the story behind it. Here is mine:



This was a "wife beater" that I got from one of my ex's. Actually, when I say I got it from him, what I really mean is I stole it from right under his nose. I'm not exactly sure why I've kept it aside from the fact that I love sleeping in this shirt. It wasn't new when I took it, so it's always had that soft, been washed a million times feeling. Before, since we didn't get to see each other all the time, I would wear it to feel closer to him. But now I just wear it because its comfortable. I've bought others like it since then (same brand same size and everything), but I always keep defaulting to this one. I even marked it with a laundry pen just so I know which one is which. Maybe in another hundred washings, the others will be as cuddly as this one is...but till then you'll find me in this shirt at least a night every week.

I would have put it on to model it, but I think that you all have already had an eyefull of ye olde lady muffins from my last mental upchuck so Ill refrain from posting another boob-ful pic here.

Postcards!

So the first thing I saw when I got home from a looong, boring, rainy (and I'm saying cats and dogs, and chickens, and cows here) day of work was a bunch of postcards in my mailbox!

WHHHHHEEEEEEEE!!!!

First up is from the lovely Cora at Love Letters by Cora. Or I guess in this case its Postcards from Cora! And actually, I have seen parts of Washington like this. Mostly in and around Ocean Shores and Long Beach. You should totally drive out there and spend some time with someone special *hint hint hint*.

Next is this fancy shmancy picture postcard from...well, Fancy at Fancy Shmancy! Funny how that worked out huh? And yes, Ms. Fancy...the picture travelled very well. Nary a scratch or crease in it!

Speaking of someone special...or rather, Cora's someone special...this here is from Mr. Scope over yonder at Scope Tech. Yes Scope...I got it. :)

These last three are from my lovely bro-han in San Fran. He couldn't decide which postcard to send me, so he sent all three. Because he loves me like that. He got them all from his place of employ, California Academy of Sciences.

Thanks a bunch from everyone who sent them. Still looking forward to the rest whenever you guys decide to send (and no rush at all! I love getting surprised when I least expect it!)

Repelling the "Furry Death" since 1999...

Just consider it a mental upchuck [Part VIII]

Part VIII: That time at the strip club

This one is inspired by Sassy Britches who blogged about her first time in a big strip joint in Louisiana.

Well, I have a story like that too and rather than bogging down her comments section and wasting a perfectly good blog-portunity (you see what I did there?? yeahhhh) I thought I'd bang out another mental upchuck for you all.

In 2006, my boyfriend at the time and I wanted to take a little trip. It turns out that his sister has been wanting him to come visit her in Arizona since he came home from Iraq the year before and he has been wanting to see his nephews too. I suggested we fly down to see her the week of Valentines Day (because we all know how much I hate that holiday and any excuse not to celebrate it was A-ok to me). I knew before hand that his sister was a bartender but I didn't know where.

We land in Phoenix at just after 1am on a red-eye from Seattle and my boyfriend hails a cab and gives an address. Like I said before, she was a bartender so we agreed to meet her at her place of employ and grab us some free drinks while we waited for her shift to end and we would all ride home together.

I should have known something was up when the taxi driver smirked at us upon hearing where we wanted to go (with our bags and luggages...straight from the airport...at 1am on a Tuesday) but I wasn't really paying attention. 20 minutes later, we arrive at a huge HUGE parking lot with what seemed to be a warehouse in the middle of the lot. At the end of the lot facing the opposite way from the direction we were coming from were these words in great big red light studded letters: .oC hsuB naksalA taerG ehT. Oh sorry...I meant: THE GREAT ALASKAN BUSH CO.

I thought, hmm...an outdoor sporting goods store? What the hell? The driver drops us off at the front door and my boyfriend hurriedly gets out of the car and starts to explain to me where we were while at the same time getting our bags out the trunk, paying the driver, and avoiding my eyes. We were at one of the biggest strip clubs in Phoenix. We meet the bouncer at the door...he tells him that we are there to see "Raine" and the bouncer smiles wide and says "oh yeah, she told us to wait for you guys, here you can put your bags in the office".

I don't know what the big deal is and why he neglected to mention where she worked prior to us getting there. I've never been a prude and never will be and I was actually pretty siked to see a strip club for the first time. Turns out there were two halves to the building. The right side was completely nekkid girls but no alcohol, and the left side was only topless with a full bar. That's where his sister worked. So I meet his sister for the first time and we chat in between her serving drinks and I think she thought I was uncomfortable in my surroundings because she kept refilling my glass and handing me cocktails. I was having fun watching the dancers spin around the pole and give lapdances and all the pretty pink and sparkly lights. Once in a while in between dances, some of the girls would come up to say Hi and flirt with my guy (I didn't care...alcohol and dazzly lights tends to make me ambivalent). Finally about an hour and a half and many many drinks later, the last of the customers had left and they turned the lights on to get ready to close shop.

Some of the girls who were ready to leave came up to the bar to meet my boyfriend and I and after the initial greetings, one of the girls named Candy (I swear I am not making this sh*t up...her REAL name was Candy) came up to me and openly stared. I tried to ignore her for a second but finally I turned to stare right back at her. She finally leaned over and whispered "who's your doctor?" whilst simultaneously poking me in the left boob. Of course alcohol tends to encourage the smart ass in me so I leaned over, poked her in HER left boob and said "GOD".

She laughed her nylon and spandex covered buns off and happily told my bf's sister to get me another shot for the road because I just helped her win a bet. I guess her and a few of the dancers who'd met me in the last hour had a bet going whether I was surgically enhanced or it was just by some freak of nature that a 5ft tall, 110lb Asian girl could really just be that endowed. Once my boyfriend and his sister (who were watching this exchange shocked and clueless) were let in on the joke, they laughed too and deemed it time to get my liquored up self home and in bed. His sister, in the office while getting our luggage said to me "Congratulations, you've just been Bushed by Candy" and handed me an official Bush Co. tank top.

I wore it around the city a couple times while we were touring around. I got some weird looks but I figured it was for the same reason that the strippers were giving me strange looks. It wasn't until a week later when we got home that my boyfriend told me that particular kind of tanktop wasn't for sale and only "official employees" were allowed to have one.

...

And I know you guys are all dying to see the shirt so here:

Peruse, ogle, stare, drool...whatever. And please, to those of you who know my parents, they are still under the delusion that this was from an outdoor sporting goods store (tho I don't see how with that naked girl on the side) but I am in no hurry to correct them any time soon.