Ain't no rest for the wicked...

Why was it a really really bad idea to be a criminal in Queen Anne (Seattle) this Friday? There was a very large memorial and parade held for the slain police officer in Queen Anne's Key Arena early Friday afternoon. They closed down streets, blocked off roads. They estimated about 1500 people to show up including police officers from all over the country (and Canada). In case you can't see the above pictures, it was all blue and white and sirens for a 4 block stretch on one side of the street. And on the other was a 4 block stretch of "unmarked, undercover" Chevy Subarbans. There was even this one classic police car from the 50's that I wanted to snap a pic of, but seeing as I was driving at the time, taking pics with my cellphone, AND there was about 15 cops in dress black surrounding the aforementioned car, I felt it wise to refrain from any illegal activity.

In somewhat the same thread...I've really been digging this song from Caged Elephant. I think it brings out the badass in me!

Blast from the Past...

My mother had me help her reorganize all our photo albums a while back. She showed me this photo that I had forgotten about and whilst reminiscing upon good memories from Disneyland, I came upon one shocking realization.

No...not that Belle looks like she's been drugged or that the guy behind us has the unfortunate circumstance of picking that shirt to go to an amusement park in...

This was me at 14.

That's right... FOURTEEN. And before you say it UB, let me say it for you..."my poor poor dad, must be why he kept the shotgun loaded in the hall closet till I turned 21".

Not much has changed. I feel like calling up dead ancestors (and of course my mother) and thanking them for the good genes. Just goes to show what good Filipino food and lots and lots of milk can do. LOTS.

I'll be sure to send them the plastic surgery and chiropractic bills too...

Filipino Housewarming Gifts...

Stolen directly from a gifts app that my brother created on Facebook. He wrote all the descriptions and put up all the pics. None of this is my handiwork. But as a good older sister, I'm here to pass off his creativity to my benefit.

If you guys don't understand the utter hilarity of some of this stuff, feel free to ask me or one of your filipino friends... Don't lie...everyone has at least one filipino friend...we are EVERYWHERE! Look behind you, there's one right now! ;)

Or not. It doesn't matter. I guffawed heartily while reading his descriptions and am continuing to guffaw heartily as I post them here. And...out of the 20 items, I or my parents have about 15 of them at any one time! ;)

For your consideration, I've included translations where needed. You're welcome.

Enjoy!

1) THE LAST SUPPER: Because you're not truly fed unless you're at the Lord's table.

2) WoW--MAGICMIC: Singing across the Philippines!

3) WOODEN SPOON AND FORK: It tells your dining room, "Hey! This is where the food goes!"

4) SKYFLAKES: The bottomless tin!

5) BACK SCRATCHER: Reach for the remote, "close" the light, or palo (spank) your kids! It's all good!

6) EXTRA LARGE DRYING RACK: I think it does some other stuff too.

7) PALM FRONDS: To remind you of arts and crafts day at church.

8) JESUS WALL HANGING [Level 1]: Entry level wall adornment. Wood frame, a nice glossy 8x10 of the redeemer himself!

9) JESUS WALL HANGING [Level 2]: Cross-stich Jesus! Hand made and oh so fabulous.

10) JESUS WALL HANGING [Level 3]: Pro status wall hanging! Is it Jesus? Is it Mary? Is it Jesus?...wait, It's BOTH! Twice the salvation for the price of one!

11) FISH TANK: What's a Filipino father to do in a maternal society? Have a fish tank of course! Until they learn about Facebook, the Filipino old timers need something to compulsively check.

12) WEEKLY CHURCH BULLETIN: Don't ever let anyone see you throw one away! It's your weekly receipt! Besides, without it, how else would you know what time to go to mass every Sunday?


13) WALIS (straw broom): Walis-walis kicks Swiffer's disposable arse times infinity! If I can rub my hands on my cleaning utensils without getting cuts and splinters, it's not worth my time!

14) WICKER FURNITURE: Can consist of wicker panels, or go the full monty and get a complete wicker set! Either way, the patterns on my arms, legs, and face don't make themselves!

15) BALIKBAYAN (going back home) BAG O' STUFF: It's so nice of us to save our old L.A. Lights rubber shoes, Breast Cancer Awareness walk t-shirts, and accidentally bleach splattered sweatshirts for our pamilya (family) back home!

16) HUGO BOSS MEN'S FRAGRANCE: Vintage 1985! It's ok that they don't make these anymore! Our dad's don't use more than a couple sprays a year. It's Burt Reynold's cologne of choice, and we're the only asians capable of growing his mustache...coincidence? I think not!

17) CORNED BEEF--AMERICAN STYLE: Ever heard this? "You don't appreciate corned beef because you haven't tasted corned beef in the Philippines! Here, it is so good that you don't even need mayo!"


18) JOHNSON'S BABY COLOGNE: Before CK1, before Nautica Competition, there was Johnson's baby cologne. For the person who's ever wondered what rubbing alcohol would smell like if it also tasted like sweet, sweet, candy.

19) WHITE FLOWER LINIMENT: Rub it on anything that ails ya! Unless what ails ya happens to be near any and all...uhm...orifices?

And last but definitely not least!

20) A FILIPINO: Filipinos kick it hardcore without forgetting about the family back home, their religion, or where they came from. Not to mention they can fix your car, build you a shed, take care of your nanay (mother), and cook you something sooo good you won't care where and what part of what animal it came from!

GET YOURS TODAY!!!

Cora says it's booby day in blog world...

Checked Google Analytics...these are what people were googling when they got sent to my blog...

Quick Survey aka. "Can I get some help up in here???"

Situation: No, Im still not back yet...but I need a raise of hands. I have an outdoor wedding to attend on Sunday. Yes, THIS Sunday (just call me the ultimate procrastinator) and I have the dress, I have the shoes, I have the purse. I have the the wedding gift all wrapped and ready to go. However, I can't decide on what makeup look to do.



...



Don't laugh. This is important to me. Well, not really important. But being indecisive pisses me off. Especially when it's me!



Anyhoo, this is for the girls. And if any of the men want to chime in, then that's fine by me.

Question: If you (I) were wearing a strapless A line dress (empire waist), cream with brown designs on it...would you have a nude eye/red lips combo or brown smokey eyes/nude lips combo?? Anyone?? Anyone??

Also, THANKS to Scope and Cora for emailing me and sending me the posts of their visit last month to my email so I can read them. My lab has blocked blogger off the servers and it sucks ass. Then when I get home Im too tired to do much than take a shower and pass out lately. Blah! I miss reading you guys!! ALL of you! ALLLLLLL OF YOU!!!!! But I have to give special shout outs to JJ, Words, Unbearable Banishment, Dr. Zibbs, Gwen, Fancy...those of you who have emailed me or added me onto Facebook ROCK!!!

Last but not least, LOOK!! it's only been 5 days since my last post this time!! Woohoo! Im getting better...but still no time to read blogs. Pisses me off! Time flies when you're working 50+ hours a week. Gah!

Where was I? Oh yeah,

Last but not least, I joined a fantasy football league. The draft (Automated) is not till 8/23 so I still have time to ditch and join a different league (if one of you guys have room in yours you still need to fill) so let me know! I haven't ranked my players yet so if you wanna send me advice please email me or leave a comment!

P.S. My team name: Them Filthy MoneyGrubbers

*teehee*

Thank You!

Ok all, here's the scoop...

I wanted to address all the comments at once because most of you guys don't check the comments after you've left yours and everyone was saying mostly the same thing. In fact the term "don't forget us little people" came up a disturbingly huge number of times!

I don't know what you guys are talking about! Im all of 5ft tall and out of all you folks, Im probably the only one who can be rightly considered "little"and I'm damn well not gonna forget myself!

PLUS, to all of you offering me services to pimp out your blogs...(no not that kind of services! PERVS) I'd pimp all you out no problem! I've got a car that needs washing, laundry, garage that needs to be cleaned, gardening, pet washing, bills to be paid.........

I have no clue how Cosmo found my blog. Judging from the pic of the heading they put up, Id say they checked out my blog during Lent...because I changed my page right after I came back from being good and holy and good and religious and good. AND I was Good...

No, they specifically addressed THIS blog...not my makeup/beauty one although that would make a heck of a lot more sense if they did.

So far I haven't seen my follower numbers go up although I did finally install Analytics. I still don't know how to use it but we will see what happens. To tell you guys the truth I'm sorta glad I haven't had an influx of people checking me out (or so I assume) because I don't want to feel like I have to edit myself on my own blog ya know?? Plus, I feel cozier with 38 friends than 38,000 hahahah.

However, if you are here from the great South African nation, and you may or may not have read an article that may or may not exist then I bid you WELCOME!!!!!!! Please click the follow button and don't leave me worrying about lurkers.

(Im still not fully convinced...sorry Sid, but Scope put the thought in my head that you may just be super fantabulous with the Photoshop and Word!...did your head explode with frustration yet???)

I want to thank all of you people. My faithful commenters who always take the time out to read me and leave a hello despite their busy busy lives (Sid, Cora, Scope, Unbearable, SkyDad, Words, Dr. Zibbs, Felisa, Girl I, Fancy, Chris, Chris, Sassy, J.J., and God --my top fifteen). My faithfull followers who may not comment all the time or hardly at all, but I still know you guys are out there,

The lurkers who read my blog and never say a word. It's kinda creepy you guys, just click the follow button and get it over with!,

And to the people I read (go visit them!!! NOW...I command you!) ...my lovely blog list of awesomeness that keep me entertained and keep me thinking of new ways to be better than you...no wait, I meant "to better myself"...yeah, that's it.

Booyah! How's that for pimpin you all out?!?!? Uhuh! Mad skills yo!

I also want to thank the Lord above for making me the great and wonderfull person I am today,

Cosmopolitan Magazine--South Africa for having the good taste to check me out,

All the little people: vern, sneezy, droopy, winky, sleepy, stinky, widget, and doc,

and last but not least...Swine Flu.

Swine flu? Oh yeah. You don't think I haven't noticed that all this hullabaloo started after I kissed this dude???

Coincidence? I think not!

YOU MAH BOY BLUE!!!!

OK...Uhm...Huh???

Before you read on, please keep in mind Im not usually so slow witted. It's just when someone emails you at midnight with this kind of news...from a magazine light years (and two weeks...according to the United States Postal system apparently) away, you tend to get a bit slow on the uptake.

Conversation with Sid from Verbal Diorhhea (link on my sidebar or just click on her name on the first line).

Sid: Hey! So I was reading this month's Cosmo magazine (the South African version) and guess who's blog got an honourable mention. Congrats chickie. Wish that I had the article with me to place onto my blog. Maybe tomorrow?

~E: Im so confused? What blog? Your blog got honorable mention? Congratulations!!!!!

Sid: No. Your blog was mentioned. Your e-deconstructed blog was mentioned in Cosmo magazine.

~E: Huh? Ok, Im so confused. How the hell was my blog mentioned in a magazine? You're making it up right? Like as a weird way of giving me a bloggy award or something?

Sid: No I'm serious. I'll bring the article in tomorrow morning, scan it and show it to you. Your blog was mentioned. I don't know how they found your blog but them mentioned the post where you showed everyone what you carry around in your handbag

~E: NO SHIT?!?! Wow. Please please please scan the article...I want to see it.

Sid: Will do.

...

Ok, Sid. If this is a set up for what I anticipate to be a really seriously satisfying joke, I'm still waiting for the punchline! Guess, we will see.

"I'm totally blingin today and you hate it!"

Ok so backstory: I have a a thing about watching makeup tutorials on YouTube and have a subscription to the YouTube channel of my favorite drag queen/makeup artiste extraordinaire Petrilude...


(his real name is Josh...)


(I know, kinda anticlimactic right?)


Anyway, Josh hosted a contest a while back asking his readers to create a look based on a picture of a sunset off Waikiki Beach. Total girlyness, but whatever...I'm a girl. Deal with it. His friend Nick (dressed as alter-ego Keisha) entered a faux contest entry and posted it. You can skip all the makeup parts and just watch the first minute...and the last 25 seconds.





Though I don't know why you would...any guy who can sport a wig and beard and limited makeup items and still look that damn good deserves to be fawned over.


I like to think he raided his sister's or girlfriend's makeup bag to do this...more on that later.


Hilarity will ensue. I guarantee it!


And here's another video from his channel. Just to show he isn't all about the girly boy makeup tutorials.






I swear I love those two guys. Never fails to make me snot-out-the-nostril laugh so hard! If they weren't both gay (one definitely...the other one maybe but I hope not) I'd marry them both in a heart beat.


Except then I'd be a polygamist and ~E don't swing that way.


And also I'd be scared they'd both be prettier than me, and ~E don't swing that way either.

K...I totally snuck that last vid of me in there (better lit one available if you clicky the linky down below)...but I think everyone deserves to know how to properly treat any nasty facial activities that may pop up from time to time. And I know I promised never to post makeup vids here again. In my defense that was NOT a makeup vid. It was a public service announcement.

So sue me.

(actually please don't. I'm poor. However, I'm not against anyone pimping me out to their friends)

(By ME I mean my other blog)

(Clearly)

Looking Back...

I wrote this a couple weeks ago, and just now managed to edit it and post it. Hope you like!

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I'm sitting here at [big seattle college institution] where my mother teaches. In the cafeteria area, with my backpack next to me and my grande caramel mocha with whip close at hand. Earphones in, music blasting away and I'm sure amongst all the other oblivious souls with their open texts or open laptops or open mouths (hastily gulping down that last drop of coffee before their next class) I look just like them. Just another student cramming away towards whatever goals we all strive for. I'm not one of them though. I used to be, but today I'm the other...the "enemy" so to speak. Today I've been invited to guest lecture, first year basic biology (sure it was my mother who did the inviting, and it's my mother's class I'm lecturing...but it's darn cool anyway). I'm not due on stage for another hour and I've already gone over my notes more times that I really ever needed to.


When I was in High School, I couldn't wait to get out. To me it was just a stepping stone towards what I really was looking forward to; college and freedom. I did about as well as I possibly could have, graduating in the top .5% of my class (yeah, you read that right... 0.5%, tied for second over all four years). My only non-A grade came from one semester of dreaded PE and you better believe I dropped that class the first millisecond I could. But I didn't do it for the "acclaim" though I have to admit it was really satisfying to hear my name called at every awards ceremony. I did it to ensure that I will get into the college I wanted to. Every little bit counted. Did all the right sports, took all the right classes, joined the best clubs. And when I graduated with the acceptance letter to [Huge Washington based research university] in hand, I gladly said good bye and good riddance and never looked back.


My 5 years at said university was all I ever could have wanted and more. I LOVED it! There, I was in my element. Independently studying among likeminded individuals all reaching for higher summits and being encouraged and challenged every step of the way. I can choose my own path, master of my own destiny and so on. Of course it wasn't all about studies (DUH!) and I had 6 of the best girl friends anyone could ever hope for to experiment with (no, not in that way...pervs!) To Cry with. Grow with. Laugh with. Parties, study dates, late night cram sessions, running to each others rooms for no reason just to talk, pranks...the quintessential college experience. Roaming around campus and the U-District in my NorthFace fleece and backpack and feeling like I belonged. Here in this school (so big it had it's own zipcode) with 45,000 other students, I felt like I really found my place in the world. I would go back in a second. Do everything over again, even all the tests and stress, the dickhead professors, waking up 15 minutes before a final or midterm, rolling out of bed after a long night of cramming to run to class in my pjs, take the test, crawl back to my dorm or apartment and go right back to sleep (or to study for the next test as it more often was the case). Give (almost) anything to feel that free again, free of any responsibilities past making sure you get home ok after this party, making sure you get to that coffee place on time to meet your friends, making sure you study just enough to pass the nasty Calculus exam tomorrow.


I graduated almost 4 years ago and I think it's taken me that long to feel like I belong in this next phase of my life. I've considered going back to school to earn my Masters and it is still an option for me. Real Life, if this is what it really is, is a bit harder to get acclimated to. I don't feel welcomed, not like how I felt from the first step onto college life and how I felt till the day I walked up the steps to accept my diploma on my graduation day.


I don't know what made me think of all this. Perhaps the building...filled with the thoughts of countless generations of students. Perhaps the atmosphere, the sounds of voices all around me, getting steadily louder as I sit here and type this. Its been a nice interlude, looking back and reminiscing. I should really look over my notes one more time... Or maybe not, I know this stuff, and if I mess up *shrug* who'll know but me? For now and the next 15 minutes till class starts, I'm gonna keep putting off "real life", keep pretending to be one of them, simultaneously wishing I was and being oddly grateful I'm not.

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[new video up...]

So you wanna feel special!!!

Blogger buddy Sid over at Verbal Diorrhoea put up a post a few days ago about how excited she was when she received a postcard from another blogger buddy Gwen at Everything I Like Causes Cancer. Apparently, Sid is an avid collector of postcards and had asked for them a while back.

Coinkidinkally, I collect postcards too! Yep, its true. So I offered to send her one if she sent me one in return. Sort of a "Ill show you mine if you show me yours" scenario. I went to the Pike Place Market today with Nerick (from Nerick's Blog) and bought me a crapton of postcards.

(And by a crapton I mean 6)

So I'm putting this out for you all...if you want a postcard from the lovely city of Seattle (don't laugh, it IS lovely...ask Scope! Right Scope?) then email me your address (mutnugget@gmail.com) and I'll send you one. Help me put a dent in this lovely book of stamps I just purchased. In return, all I ask is a postcard back from whatever equally lovely city you reside in, your undying love and devotion, and $100 bucks paypalled to me.

...

Ok, ok...I was kidding about the $100 bucks.

...

And maybe the undying love and devotion too.

...

But I WAS NOT lying about the postcards.

Oh and also, blogger buddy Trooper Thorn at Dogs and Jeans has issued a challenge to Ashton Kutcher. First one to gain 100 new blog followers will have to give $100 dollars to Unicef. Help a brother out will ya?

[Shameless self-promotion: new video posted at my other blog Just Another Beauty Blog...you get to hear my squeeky voice and my ghetto fab accent...or do you???]

Moral Dilemma

Before I start on my post for the day, can I just say that since my last video how to was apparently such a great hit, I'm thinking of doing one once a week. Or maybe once every 10 days...depending on my lazyness factor and if I have time. So for those of you who liked the tutorial, check back every few days for new ones.

And for my loyal followers, NO this is not gonna turn into some girly chic blog LOL. Well, at least not everyday!

On to the real topic at hand.

Now that the weather is getting nice (or should I say NICE-ER for Seattle) I've been jogging outside instead of the treadmill. I have seen this dog walking around the same area of my neighborhood maybe 5 times already and everytime I see him (or her) I haven't been close enough to see if it had a collar. Even though it looks pretty well fed and fluffy (yes, I use "fluffy" as an indication of good health...applies to dogs, cats, babies and people) it's always walking around so dejected looking. I don't know if it's lost, homeless or just old.

I was walking to the store yesterday and it was there again! I ran back home and ran back with a camera to take a pic and thankfully it was in the same spot.

So I'm thinking my options are this:

1) Take it home with me and love it forever. It looks like a Husky or possibly an Alaskan Malamute?

2) Call the owners.

3) Call the pound.

Now here's my problem. All of these options rely on me getting close enough to see if it has a collar or to look for a chip under the skin. If I knew for sure it was a friendly dog I wouldn't mind calling to it, or running right up to it...I've had dogs before and I'm not scared of them. OR...In my quest to be all PETA, get bitten, get rabies, and die a painful death.

Anyone?

Random Hilarity

1) My mother is a Dentist. Not only that but she teaches Dental Anatomy and Histology. BUT, her nickname at work and at school?? "CANDY".



2) A coworker and I witness a speeding Corvette get pulled over by a cop in front of our work. The cop lets the guy go with a warning because he noticed that his cruiser, and the guy's Corvette is blocking the path of a gigantic Budweiser truck trying to get out of the parking lot. The quote of the day uttered by said coworker..."Getting saved by beer while you're driving rarely ever happens."



3) A lab technician in the place I used to work at came in with a cold one day. As he was looking over another lab tech's shoulder as she meticulously inoculated some petri dishes, he sneezed all over her counter. What came out of his mouth next?? "Dammit, I've gone and infected the virus"



4) A friend's mom (and yes, you know who you are!) adopted a Daschund from a local pound. When asked what made her choose that dog over all the others, she said (as she snuggled and kissed the pooch) "because he looks just like a sausage and Mommy loves her big brown sausages"



5) And finally, two quotes from the great Jack Handy...



"If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did"



"I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world because they'd never expect it."

My goal...

...is to post my 200th blog on my birthday.

That gives me 25 blogs to post (not including this one) in 51 days.

No more slacking allowed.

*sniff sniff* I feel so loved!

Bella: Forget the damn Superbowl, where have you been?!

Felisa: OH MY GOSH! You're alive!

Wicked Mr. J: You now have 24 hours to post a blog or email me the hell back or else I'm calling in the cadaver dogs.

Mr. C: How have you been doing?

Scandinavian God: Did I do something wrong?? Or are you dead? Maybe you're just dead...but did I do something?

...

Wow! I feel so loved! Worry not blogger citizens (and other people who read my blog), I have two whole days off this week (and tomorrow, but Ill be watching the superbowl) and I fully intend on channeling my inner couch potato and reading all your blogs from the last two weeks and inserting my own brand of witty commentary. In the meantime:

Bella: I love you too.

Felisa: Yep, Im here!

Mr. J: do I get extra points for posting two in one day?

Amanda: Haven't seen the new doll yet, and please don't die! Im not ready to meet you in hell yet.

Sabrae: Whatever! You know you still worship the quicksand I walk on.

And to the rest of you who will undoubtedly leave comments after this post, I can't wait to read about all the mischief you guys have been up to!

Never Fear!

...E's still here. Kinda. So sorry for the lack of bloggy presence in the last few days as reitterated time and again by the texts and emails and blog comments that I have received, all along the lines of "WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?"

Fear not and don't call the cops. I'm here...not dead (ish). Just add up looong days at work + supervisor changes + brand spankin new gym membership and what do you get? ME. Dead tired at night, barely conscious enough to drag my sorry butt to bed and definitely not conscious enough to blog (both read and write).

I've got a few more days of the crazy schedule then things should mellow out so you'll be getting more of the same first rate entertainment you've come to expect from me very very soon.

In the meantime here's a joke for you all:

A dude walks into a bar.

Wow, that's so trite and overdone...ok, let me change that...

A PIRATE walks into a bar (*grin*) wearing a steering wheel as a belt buckle. The bartender looks over and asks the pirate "Hey! Why are you wearing a steering wheel as a belt buckle?" and the pirate answers:

"Arrrgh...It's drivin' me nuts!"

Oh, the mind of a female...bored out of her head.

Due to some unfortunate circumstances, I was forced to stay at home from an otherwise normal work day. Normally when I have a planned day off, it is just what it is...PLANNED. Today, not so much. I had little to do but slather on face cream once every 3 hours (as needed) and wash my face with cold water prior to doing so (as needed). So it was during one of those times when I was lying in bed with anti-rash face goo on and a cold wet towel over my face (killing two birds with one stone...my specialty) that I found myself with nothing to do but think random thoughts.



-I need to get some more female friends. Like real female friends. Because if I ever get married and had to plan a bachelorette party, I would want more than 6 people to come. And if I invited a bunch of people I didn't know...well, that would be just sad.



-I should totally start designing my own wedding gown just in case. Like asap! Who knows how long it will take to make and how long I'd have to work out to fit into it! Years maybe! Stupid genes and stupid tummy bulges.



-I wonder...if I lay down long enough would my organs shift in the flat position so that when I finally get up I'd look like I had a flat stomach? Note to self...experiment to see how long of a lay down would produce the most effective flat belly illusion.



-*Gasp* Oh my God! Am I...??? *counting in my head* Oh no...false alarm, I'm good...another week and a half.



-I'm getting fat again. *sigh*



-I'm hungry. I should thank Alison for recommending that shampoo...it smells really good! *sniff* like apricots...or baked apples! Hmmm apple pie!!!



-Is that my phone ringing? *listens* Eh, it's just a text. I'm in no mood to answer it now so whoever it is can just suck it.



-I should really call HIM. When was the last time I talked to him again? Hmm...can't remember. Oh well, I don't care. I'll probably just annoy him. But what if he really wants to talk to me but is just waiting for me to call? Whatever, if he wanted to talk to you he'd call you. But what if he thinks it's my turn to call him? Nah, he's busy with work and his new girlfriend so if he wanted to chat then he can just damn well call you first.



-Maybe I should just send him a quick email. A joke or just to say hi. Or maybe not. Hmm. I'll give it another week, and if he still hasn't called then I'll send him a quick text.



-I wonder how Eagle is? I should email him...you know, just to make sure he's still alive. Note to self, email Eagle and see if he needs me to send him anything. And ask him for that stupid picture he keeps telling you he'll send.



-Some guys are just too pretty. Too darn pretty for their own good. Darn all pretty guys! Darn them to heck!



-I wonder what the Scandinavian God is doing? I should ask him to send me another one of his songs. I wonder if he'll consider it a compliment or an insult if I told him I listen to them to fall asleep....Compliment? Insult? Compliment? Insult?... He'll probably be insulted. Nevermind.



-I should have put my ipod on before I lay down. Maybe it's around here.



*feels around on her nightstand and the shelves behind her bed*



-Nope, guess not. Next time then. Remind me.



-Oooh, if I press my fingers into my eyes hard enough, I can see stars!



-How long have I been lying here? Dang it, I should have set a timer. Or I can just get up and look at the clock! Nah, I'll just sit here for another few minutes and chill....



*2 hours later*



-Dammit, did I fall asleep? I must have! I should wash my face again.



*hauls myself up from bed*



-OOps...got up too fast. I should lay down for a second till the floor stops spinning.



*hour and a half later*



-DAMMIT!

Let the gift giving commence!

Ok, so I spent yesterday baking and making to my hearts content for Christmas goodies to hand out to deserving folks. You can see all my creations here (hint...Christmas Goodies 1,2,3). And today, I get tagged by the great Dr. Zibbs to participate in even more gift giving...oh be still my weak heart...

So without further adieu:

The That Blue Yak Crappy Gifts for Sick People Stockpile

You see, most people don't want to actually buy a gift for charity. But what if you didn't have to actually buy one? I'm proposing that we make a list of gifts that MIGHT be given to some sick people and we just send the list to a place where sick people are. Maybe, just maybe, some rich dude will see the list and buy all of the presents for the sick people.

Who knows?And why waste really good things on sick people? They're probably going to just cough on it anyway or something. And it's the thought that counts right? So the crappier the gift the better.

So what you do is:

1) Pick a crappy gift for the That Blue Yak Crappy Gifts For Sick People Stockpile and post it on your site.

2) Pick 5 bloggers that you think might want to open their hearts and pick a crappy gift.

3) Link back to this post.

4) And if you really want to get into heaven, write, "I POSTED A CRAPPY GIFT" in the comments section of this post so we can see the crappy gifts you picked.

So my crappy gift is:

AHAHAHAHAH! Oh, the literal irony of it all! Get it? Crappy gift?? AHAHAHA...I kill myself! Fake poo is not for college pranks and 12 year old boys anymore! They are the gift that keeps on giving!

Ok, all you little blogger elves, I pick these people to be my proverbial bell ringers this season:

1) Sid from Verbal Diorhea

2) The Poobomber

3) Chris from Inane Thoughts and Ramblings

4) Sabrae

5) Candy

Snow Day!

It snowed!!! IT SNOWED IT SNOWED IT SNOWED!! A glorious 3 inches so far!

I know a few of my readership are from the "East Coast" or "The Midwest" and you guys are thinking that 3 inches of snow does not constitute a snowstorm, but rather a snow dusting. And then there are the "rest of you" who would kill for 3 inches (and I don't just mean in snow...*wink wink*).

Fortunately for me, I do not live in those places. I live in "Seattle" where life screeches to a screaming halt at the mere mention of snow. Schools close down. Snowmen go up. And bosses accept "I think it may snow tomorrow and I'm scared so I'm staying home...SUCK IT!" as a valid excuse not to go to work.

With that said *looks around stealthily and whispers* "I've got an unexpected day off today..heheheheh".

What to do...what to do.

Perhaps Ill go visit Zibbs' site and troll the internet for some crappy gifts. Perhaps Ill brave the biting cold and help the littlest bro-han build a snowman (not likely). Perhaps I'll finally finish that novel I've been working on. Or perhaps Ill haul my lazy ass back to bed and take a nap.

...

Nap it is! And keep your pants on Dr. Zibbs, Ill get to the gift giving when I wake up!

HEY!! READ THIS!!!

YAY!! I got another award! Better not to let it get to my head!

Just like the first one, this one is from THAT DAMN EXPAT because let's face it: 1)I AM pretty damn fabulous...and 2) She loves me, she just doesn't know it yet.

As per the rules I need to give this award to 8 other people. But here's the catch, she already gave the same award to some of the people I was planning on giving the award to (Gwen and Fancy), so I'm just gonna go with 5...because I don't want to give people ginormous ego-trips.

Here are the rules:

This blog invests and believes in the PROXIMITY - nearness in space, time and relationships! These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in prizes or self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers! Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award.

And the five bloggers who deserve this award (less than I do):

1) A Crown Of Thisles: because I like the way he describes his wife as the "Buxom and Clever and Easily Terrified Bouddica"

2) The Untitled Blogger Project: because he gives me good chats to post when I can't come up with my own material.

3) The Unbearable Banishment: because he makes me want to travel 3000 miles to visit New York with every single one of his posts.

4) Girl Uninterrupted: because she is a girl from my own heart. If she isn't careful she could end up like me...scary!

5) View from 5280ft: because he is sending me a Christmas card, but promises not to stalk me.

Now for the rest of you, fear not...I love reading you all! Those of you in my blogroll who get alot of awards or who already got an award from me were skipped to give others a chance at greatness. Somebody give me another award so I can hand out some more please!

Also, if you read this blog and enjoy it, can I ask you a teensy weensy favor? Can you please click on that little link to the left that says "follow this blog" so I know who you are? I know a lot of you read and comment but I don't see your pretty little faces in my followers section.

And remember, "follower" is just a label. It in no way shape or form says anything about your personal preferences and/or tendencies.

How to Make A Cool Looking Snowman!

In celebration of the first snowfall of the year (at least here in Seattle), I hereby share with you the instructions on how to make a snowman that will get all the neighbors gawking and snapping pictures out in your lawn.

Ingredients:

Snow (duh)
One blue bucket
2 desk chair wheels (the rolly caster kind)
2 black bottle caps
1 blue bottle cap
1 black rock
1 red chair-shaped foam cellphone holder
2 pairs of gloves
1 hat from a stuffed animal
1 scarf
2 twigs for eyebrows
2 huge branches
2 little branches
and a younger brother to help you haul each piece to its proper place.

Throw it all together, add some pizazz and an overproud sister with a camera and you get:

My brother and his creation, last year after our first snowstorm.

And then the next day, he "borrowed" some snow from the man and added a little something something...he says it's the snowman equivalent of 1)liposuction and 2)giving birth.

My brother is just shy of 6ft. tall so you can imagine how big that thing was to begin with. They were going to make a mommy snowman too but ran out of snow. Now I know it's not all fancy and stuff but keep in mind we lived in a neighborhood full of lazy people and ours was the only snowman in the whole complex. Plus as far as snow storms go, it only dropped 5 inches total so there was not much to work with. I'm glad too because this one took almost 3 weeks to melt and it started to look really pathetic and saggy towards the end (much like humans when they're about to die).